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dreamer64030
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Name: Rachel
Birthday: 10/28/1988
Gender: Female
Interests: piano, flute, singing, tennis, reading, hanging with friends, being spontaneous :D
Message: message me
Member Since:
2/4/2004
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| check out my myspace: myspace.com/bellefille1028
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| EDIT: Do you ever wish that (excuse my metaphor) you could be like an
ostrich that sticks their head in the "sand," and for a little bit,
makes everything going on around them seem to disappear?.......cuz I
sure do.
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So I'm pretty much convinced I have some of the most amazing friends.
 . I've been getting together with a lot of
people lately that I haven't seen in like forever, and then my SA
friends on a regular basis for the last couple weeks. It was so much
fun seeing Alex when she was here for the One Thing conference...I'm
going to try to save some $$$ to fly up to Chicago to see her during some of
my spring break in March. That would be so cool!!!  I got to see Arianna this month, too...it was only for a couple hours, though, but it was still great to see her.
Then for the last couple weeks, I've been going over to Hannah's house
after school some days to watch American Idol. Oh my word, I cannot
believe some of the people on the show..."I'ma
entra...ummm...entri...entrepreneur...yeah, that's it...." Sorry, I
didn't mean to get started on a mean streak there, it's just kinda
funny. There are some people with amazing voices, too, though.
(anyways....) plus, I had some REALLY DORKY moments there today, and
they still love me...aww...
I feel incredibly gross right now...after eating a full meal at the
Johnson's, I went out to eat a Blue Koi with Sarah. (why, oh, why did I
have to do that???) It was soooooo good (soup, veggie dumplings, and
bubble tea...mmmmm), and we basically split it all, but I'm going to
explode, I swear.
So, ya...onto different things. Work has been going pretty well. I do
have to admit that I'm getting slightly sick of all the stupid
high-school drama that's going on there, though. I know I probably
contribute a fair deal to it, too, but sometimes I just wish that we
would all grow up a little!!! Plus, I think I might be a little bit of a
work-a-holic already, and I'm only seventeen...I honestly don't think
that's good.
As for school, it's not as bad as I thought it was going to be.
Surprisingly, I'm actually really enjoying Geometry and Brit Lit, and
Chemistry's not too bad either. I know I'm a nerd, what can I
say? I'm sure within the next couple days I'll be screaming, "I hate
school!!!" over and over, but for now....
I guess I should probably go now that I've rambled on and on and on and on.............goodbye now. 
rachel
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EDIT---(Thursday) Ok, so today was a lot better...so far, at least.
Surprisingly, British Lit was the best part of my (school) day. We read
the Importance of Being Earnest out loud, and it was hilarious. I was
Gwendolen and got to declare my passionate love for Jack (played by an
embarrassed and unsuspecting...)
Anyways, I'm headed out to Lydia's...should be fun!
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I feel so confused and frustrated with myself right now. I wish I could
just figure out what I want with this whole ordeal (or so it seems). I
guess I think I made the right decision, but now I'm faced with it
almost every day, and it's a lot harder than
I thought it was going to be. You see, it seemed perfect, but then I
had to ask myself if it was right for me. And I still don't know. Then
there's the very real possibility that I may miss my chance before
long...ARGH.
Have you ever wanted to fast forward your life five years to see where
you would be then? I always wonder what problems will have been solved
by then, but then there are eventually going to be new ones once the
old ones go away. I hate this game. I've been wishing for a normal
life, but come to think of it, I don't think there is such a thing
called normal. I guess for me normal is constant gain-loss, repeat, etc. of people I
care about-whether it be death or just growing apart-and trying to
trust God in the midst of it all. Sometimes I feel like I can't take it
anymore, but somehow there always seems to be a way...uhh, called
JESUS. Thank God for him...honestly. I don't know what I would do
sometimes if I didn't have him to cling to.
Ok, sorry for that depressing start...it's just what I'm feeling, so I thought I'd share. 
I did, however, get together with Deborah, Hannah, and Mary on Friday,
which was awesome. We went to the mall and then back to Hannah's house
to watch a movie...just hanging out was exactly what I needed! I'm
probably doing something with Lydia and Shannon tomorrow night, too,
sooo....The work party on Saturday night was, well...not great, but
anyways....
Ok, I should probably get finished w/ homework since I have school in
ten hours...ick, ick, ick. Actually I don't mind it too much, it's just
that I have to come home from work at 9 and do hw afterwards. hmph.
(casholla, baby!!! )
LOVE!!!
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| - Making Memories of Us
Wow, so much has happened since I last updated. Not having school for the past two and a half weeks has been amazing!!!
I thought I wouldn't know what to do with myself, but I've actually
kept pretty busy. Of course there's always work, so that's been nothing
new.
A couple weeks ago we had a SA party and Deborah's house. There weren't
tons of people there, but it was still fun to hang out w/ everyone
outside of school.
My dad and Marie left for Seattle about a week earlier than planned for
Christmas, so I went and stayed with Alyson and Ben 'til I left that
Thursday (I guess that's nothing new either). It was extremely weird
being away from my family for Christmas, but I still had a great time
in Seattle with everyone (except for the horrible allergies I got from
Amanda's cats...oh, and the awful cold I just am getting over now).
Naw, I'm just kidding. We went shopping in the city, jumped in
puddles on rainy days, had late night conversations about life
drama...yadda, yadda, yadda.
Then this past week was the One Thing conference. I didn't go to the
first part of it b/c I was sick, but the time I got to spent there was
awesome. Even though the preaching is pretty similar every year, it
always grasps my heart in a whole new way every time. I got to see some
people there who I haven't seen in a looong time and/or just don't get
to hang out with very often.
I missed all of yesterday, though, b/c I went to Hillsboro, KS w/ my
brothers and sisters to visit my mom's side of the family. Being there
this year had a whole new added meaning to me...it felt like the only
normal thing about Christmas this year; and I loved having the tie to
my mom, too.
I'e discovered yet another really crappy part
of life that I'm going to have deal with whether I like it or not. It's
probably not something I should post on xanga, but if you know me, ask
me and I'll tell ya. 
Ok, I should proably go tackle the tornado sight some call a bedroom. Yepp, should be fun.
Love!
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| - Iris
Wow. Three weeks with no update? A lot has happened since then, so here goes nothing.
First off, school is making me crazy right now. I'm just so fed up with it that I have like almost no motivation anymore to study (esp. for Chemistry, which is the subject I should be studying most...grrr.) At least we had a snow day on Thursday, so I just bummed around the house and watched movies. I just want to have nothing school related to deal with for a while, so we'll see how this last week of school goes before Christmas break. Finals, finals, and a Spanish project that I have done hardly anything with. AHH!!! I am such a major procrastinator.
Aside from that madness, let's see...I have been working gobs lately. I think I worked like 35 hrs. last week, and work at least 30 this week. I like it b/c I get a good paycheck (and get to see certain people while I'm there ), but it feels like I've hardly seen any of my friends recently. I guess there was Lyssa's bday thing, and then I've hung out with Amyann a couple times, but not much socializing has been done other than that...at least with girls.  I'm having a girls night on Thursday with Shannon, and I can't wait! It will be filled with celebration of Christmas break (!!!), chickflicks, consuming way too much chocolate for our own good, and very little sleep, I'm sure. YAY!
Having said that (and not going into too much detail...), I'm liking the dating scene. We've been hanging out at going on some fun dates...basically just getting to know eachother personally...taking it slow. We're going to courtwarming (I think?) next month. It'll be my first school dance, so it should be interesting, but I'm looking forward to it a lot. I'm having a lot of fun, and I guess that's what matters for now.
Life with the fam...it's actually been going pretty good. We have had some major, uh, shall we say rocky moments (?), but I think we're getting to a more steady point...finally. I'm sick of the drama! The siblings got babysitters for Aidan and Sophie tonight, and the rest of the fam went to dinner at the Plaza, and then went to go see the Christmas Carol at UMKC. The first part of the play was kinda slow, but I really enjoyed the rest of it after that. Here's a pic that we took before leaving my house...
Holidays without my mom this year have been a lot harder to deal with than last year. I don't quite know why, but I really miss her. There's just so much new stuff going on in my life that I wish she could have seen and been a part of.  A year and a half ago seems like another lifetime, or something.
Alrighty then...I think it's about time I get off this thing and make myself useful by doing some homework...at midnight...yeah, that's smart.
Leave me some love...adios!
~rach~
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